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Sep. 18th, 2025 09:09 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
spryngFine, I guess taking a break works. I've written 10k on a stupid little WIP since Sunday after purposefully not writing for several weeks.
I'd been reading and lifting and going for walks and noodling on the piano and -- yes -- also wailing and gnashing my teeth that I was never going to write again. I had a really rough weekend the week before, only to realize midway through that maaaaybe this was depression/anxiety and not actually the universe telling me to quit.
I took an emergency claritin (anti-histamines help calm anxiety symptoms), told myself not to leave every writing/online group I was part of, and reassessed my inputs -- that is to say, food/sleep/internet. All of it was off, so I took a deep breath and reset. My brain calmed down over the following week (although I went a little too hard on the food part; you need to eat more, girl) and I allowed myself a steady morning rhythm of lifting and reading.
Then, Sunday morning, something in the book I was reading made my brain go click. Instead of ignoring the feeling, I put the book down and started writing, thinking I'd just play with the idea until it lost its shine. Except then I kept writing. And now I've hit 10k and my hindbrain is chewing on something book-shaped and I don't know where I'm going with this, but so far it's fun, and that's really all that matters. I feel a little less broken, a little more excited, and who knows -- maybe I'll do something with this.
Or just hide it with the rest of my WIPs.
Meanwhile, the kitten seems to be settling in nicely. We had a few hissing spates between the older cats, but she's been venturing out further and further. At least one of the other cats seems to fully accept her and the other one is starting to... grudgingly.
The funny part has been that kitten does, well, kitten things. Like chewing on things she shouldn't etc. CG was surprised by this and I had to explain to her that right now, kitten is basically a toddler. She has no impulse control and everything she sees is "mine!!" So CG has banned kitten from her room, at least unsupervised.
The kitten has had a good influence on our older cats, though. Maurice has been running around and playing way more than she used to and even Trixie has gotten less skittish. I think standing up to the kitten is focusing Trixie's anxiety, lol.
It's just interesting to watch and so much easier knowing what to expect from a kitten/cats. When we first got Kona and Darj, they were about this age and I'd never had a cat before. I was surprised by how rambunctious and destructive they were. Now I'm like "eh, could be worse." I love her kitten energy... for now.
I'd been reading and lifting and going for walks and noodling on the piano and -- yes -- also wailing and gnashing my teeth that I was never going to write again. I had a really rough weekend the week before, only to realize midway through that maaaaybe this was depression/anxiety and not actually the universe telling me to quit.
I took an emergency claritin (anti-histamines help calm anxiety symptoms), told myself not to leave every writing/online group I was part of, and reassessed my inputs -- that is to say, food/sleep/internet. All of it was off, so I took a deep breath and reset. My brain calmed down over the following week (although I went a little too hard on the food part; you need to eat more, girl) and I allowed myself a steady morning rhythm of lifting and reading.
Then, Sunday morning, something in the book I was reading made my brain go click. Instead of ignoring the feeling, I put the book down and started writing, thinking I'd just play with the idea until it lost its shine. Except then I kept writing. And now I've hit 10k and my hindbrain is chewing on something book-shaped and I don't know where I'm going with this, but so far it's fun, and that's really all that matters. I feel a little less broken, a little more excited, and who knows -- maybe I'll do something with this.
Or just hide it with the rest of my WIPs.
Meanwhile, the kitten seems to be settling in nicely. We had a few hissing spates between the older cats, but she's been venturing out further and further. At least one of the other cats seems to fully accept her and the other one is starting to... grudgingly.
The funny part has been that kitten does, well, kitten things. Like chewing on things she shouldn't etc. CG was surprised by this and I had to explain to her that right now, kitten is basically a toddler. She has no impulse control and everything she sees is "mine!!" So CG has banned kitten from her room, at least unsupervised.
The kitten has had a good influence on our older cats, though. Maurice has been running around and playing way more than she used to and even Trixie has gotten less skittish. I think standing up to the kitten is focusing Trixie's anxiety, lol.
It's just interesting to watch and so much easier knowing what to expect from a kitten/cats. When we first got Kona and Darj, they were about this age and I'd never had a cat before. I was surprised by how rambunctious and destructive they were. Now I'm like "eh, could be worse." I love her kitten energy... for now.
no subject
Date: 2025-09-18 03:02 pm (UTC)