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Sep. 29th, 2013 07:50 pmAs of this morning, we officially have three chickens laying. We picked up three eggs when we checked on them before noon, then another one this evening. It's kind of exciting. We'd both kind of given up on eggs happening any time soon when suddenly EGGS. From observing our flock, it looks like one more will probably join our other layers soon, then we'll have a lull until the next round. But still! Four eggs a day will be grand!
I've been thinking about gaybies a lot in the last month (or two or three). Lady quite suddenly got on board when she realized someone she knows might be a good genetic match and since then it's felt a lot more real. I don't plan on doing anything before May, and a shit ton of things can change in six months, but I feel like I'm currently existing in a state of prenatal. It's weird and exciting and terrifying all at the same time.
I keep thinking of what kind of parent I'll be, the kinds of things I want to make sure my kid understands, the kind of childhood I want to give him/her. It's funny, because when I first floated the idea around friends, they - almost to a one - asked what I'd do if I had a boy. Which is fair, because I've been pretty misandrist since teenagehood, and even when they first asked I was like... "uuuhh."
But now I kind of want a boy. I would love to raise a feminist, to teach him to respect women as well as be incredibly secure in his masculinity. The more I think about it, the more I realize I'd probably identify more with a son anyway, since odds are he'd be straight, and then I could at least understand the liking of girls.
Not that I'll have any say in the matter when it actually comes down to it, but at least I feel a lot more comfortable with either happening.
Then, of course, there's the when. I mentioned May above, but that would be the absolute earliest, and that's if the stars aline. In my ideal world, I will have gotten somewhere with all my queries and writing and Lady would have a much better idea of phd vs masters and we would have a definite date for leaving Tucson and I would know that my parents were moving to AZ in the next nine-ish months. Ideally, I would be preggers and give birth in AZ and have family & friends immediately around for help and after six months we would move to Virginia and Lady would have an awesome, $-filled job in science and I could stay at home and work on building our farm contacts and raising the kid and and and -
But a lot can change in six months and my parents, due to the sequestration and the ongoing drama with the GOP, have no idea when they'll be able to retire and move, and who knows where Lady will be in six months and who knows if I'll have actually gotten anywhere with my writing and and and -
Because as lesbians we kind of have to know what's going on and have some money saved (omg legal fees wtf), even if we go the cheapo known-donor route. Neither VA nor AZ are very glbtq friendly nor do they seem to have anything set up for second-parent adoption. :/ Sometimes I get a bit angry at all the extra hurdles we have vs a hetero couple for having kids and going through life, but well, like I said in my blog post, at least it proves we really actually want the kid.
In conclusion: babies. But not right now.
I've been thinking about gaybies a lot in the last month (or two or three). Lady quite suddenly got on board when she realized someone she knows might be a good genetic match and since then it's felt a lot more real. I don't plan on doing anything before May, and a shit ton of things can change in six months, but I feel like I'm currently existing in a state of prenatal. It's weird and exciting and terrifying all at the same time.
I keep thinking of what kind of parent I'll be, the kinds of things I want to make sure my kid understands, the kind of childhood I want to give him/her. It's funny, because when I first floated the idea around friends, they - almost to a one - asked what I'd do if I had a boy. Which is fair, because I've been pretty misandrist since teenagehood, and even when they first asked I was like... "uuuhh."
But now I kind of want a boy. I would love to raise a feminist, to teach him to respect women as well as be incredibly secure in his masculinity. The more I think about it, the more I realize I'd probably identify more with a son anyway, since odds are he'd be straight, and then I could at least understand the liking of girls.
Not that I'll have any say in the matter when it actually comes down to it, but at least I feel a lot more comfortable with either happening.
Then, of course, there's the when. I mentioned May above, but that would be the absolute earliest, and that's if the stars aline. In my ideal world, I will have gotten somewhere with all my queries and writing and Lady would have a much better idea of phd vs masters and we would have a definite date for leaving Tucson and I would know that my parents were moving to AZ in the next nine-ish months. Ideally, I would be preggers and give birth in AZ and have family & friends immediately around for help and after six months we would move to Virginia and Lady would have an awesome, $-filled job in science and I could stay at home and work on building our farm contacts and raising the kid and and and -
But a lot can change in six months and my parents, due to the sequestration and the ongoing drama with the GOP, have no idea when they'll be able to retire and move, and who knows where Lady will be in six months and who knows if I'll have actually gotten anywhere with my writing and and and -
Because as lesbians we kind of have to know what's going on and have some money saved (omg legal fees wtf), even if we go the cheapo known-donor route. Neither VA nor AZ are very glbtq friendly nor do they seem to have anything set up for second-parent adoption. :/ Sometimes I get a bit angry at all the extra hurdles we have vs a hetero couple for having kids and going through life, but well, like I said in my blog post, at least it proves we really actually want the kid.
In conclusion: babies. But not right now.
