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Aug. 30th, 2010 08:59 pmI wrote seven pages today and it was awesome. Not necessarily the pages themselves, but getting back into that. Time was I could crank out ten pages a night, and I aim to get back to that. Writing has always been the most fulfilling thing for me and it's a shame I've let it slip as much as I have.
No one's gotten back to me yet in regards to employment, and I'm up to ten or twelve inquiries. Of course that's nothing these days, but it's still disheartening. I haven't even heard back from a temp agency, for goodness sake. Oh well - keep trucking. Dad also showed me the gov't job website, so I'll start mining that tomorrow.
I got back from IL last night. It was a much less depressed affair than I was expecting, partially because we had all been waiting for this for nigh on two years. When grandpa had first been re-diagnosed with the brain tumor, he was given a few weeks at best. That was in 2009. They had their 60th wedding anniversary that summer and most of the family was there, so most everyone got to see him one last time. And mom managed to make it out there right before he died; I'm so glad grandma didn't have to find him like that by herself. So he's gone, but it was at the end of a very long, roller-coaster, terminal disease. He needed to go; he was a very strong-willed and independent man and seeing him reduced to that was horrible enough. I worry about my grandma - this has been very hard on her, obviously, and she hasn't been doing very well herself with all the stress. But if she goes, she'll at least be with him. I worry about my mom - she just lost her dad, and she could very well lose her mom soon too. She spent a lot of will and effort going out to visit every month. She gave up on a knee surgery earlier this month in case grandpa did die. But she needs that knee surgery - she can hardly walk anymore and it's only making her health worse.
I worry about my own dad. He's healthy, he's got a few years yet, but what happens when one of them falls ill and they're still living in the middle of nowhere, MD? If nothing else, I learned the strength a community can give you when you're ill and there is very little community in southern MD. I worry about them both; what my mom did, traveling out there every single month despite being half a continent away was extraordinary. I don't think I could do that, even with the prohibitive cost of tickets alone. :/
So those're my bright and happy thoughts on the eve of my birthday. Another reason I'd rather forgo turning 24 and stay at 23 for another year. :)
No one's gotten back to me yet in regards to employment, and I'm up to ten or twelve inquiries. Of course that's nothing these days, but it's still disheartening. I haven't even heard back from a temp agency, for goodness sake. Oh well - keep trucking. Dad also showed me the gov't job website, so I'll start mining that tomorrow.
I got back from IL last night. It was a much less depressed affair than I was expecting, partially because we had all been waiting for this for nigh on two years. When grandpa had first been re-diagnosed with the brain tumor, he was given a few weeks at best. That was in 2009. They had their 60th wedding anniversary that summer and most of the family was there, so most everyone got to see him one last time. And mom managed to make it out there right before he died; I'm so glad grandma didn't have to find him like that by herself. So he's gone, but it was at the end of a very long, roller-coaster, terminal disease. He needed to go; he was a very strong-willed and independent man and seeing him reduced to that was horrible enough. I worry about my grandma - this has been very hard on her, obviously, and she hasn't been doing very well herself with all the stress. But if she goes, she'll at least be with him. I worry about my mom - she just lost her dad, and she could very well lose her mom soon too. She spent a lot of will and effort going out to visit every month. She gave up on a knee surgery earlier this month in case grandpa did die. But she needs that knee surgery - she can hardly walk anymore and it's only making her health worse.
I worry about my own dad. He's healthy, he's got a few years yet, but what happens when one of them falls ill and they're still living in the middle of nowhere, MD? If nothing else, I learned the strength a community can give you when you're ill and there is very little community in southern MD. I worry about them both; what my mom did, traveling out there every single month despite being half a continent away was extraordinary. I don't think I could do that, even with the prohibitive cost of tickets alone. :/
So those're my bright and happy thoughts on the eve of my birthday. Another reason I'd rather forgo turning 24 and stay at 23 for another year. :)
